clarifiED here! On behalf of the editorial team at mathNEWS, I’d like to apologize about uploading Friday’s issue two days late.

Blame terrifiED.

Enjoy!

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The last time we had an election, we didn’t have blackBOXes, or mathASKS, or profTHOUGHTS, or seven engineering buildings, or thirty-page mathNEWS issues…my, how times have changed.

Anyways, if you are eligible to vote, do so! Instructions can be found in the elections section of this issue, which you will of course have opened before I even finish this sentence.

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Not you, of course. mathNEWS is the fairest of them all.

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…how does the rest of the cheer go again? I haven’t heard it since orientation.

Man, I really miss orientation. If only there was a mathNEWS issue that could remind me of how great that was.

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Here’s an issue.

Now scram, I’ve got way too many finals to study for.

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Unfortunately, we’re not allowed to let it appear anytime soon for prodNIGHTs.

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We forget to publish our own work online from time to time, but we’ll never be > 3 years late in doing so.

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Yes I should have looked it up really quickly. I don’t have excuses.

Please come roast staplED in MC3030. Thank you.

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This issue is guaranteed to have passed health and safety regulations, in addition to entertaining the student body with tentacles.

Read comfortably, for no humans were harmed in creation of this issue.

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At least if you get your weather app to display temperatures in Fahrenheit and interpret that as Celsius, you can pretend you’re on vacation instead of in school.

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