I regret to inform you that the title might be unfortunately true. I am writing this in a hurry to escape whatever or whomever is following me. I am currently in a safe spot, but I cannot be sure it will be safe in any given minute. I cannot reveal where I am either, for this is the safe spot for all editors, and I cannot risk our safety.
We thought that it would be a harmless April Fools joke, but some organizations have been deeply offended by our “act”, and have come for us in swooping vengeance. They haven’t caught us yet but I can’t be sure since my phone ran out of battery and the internet is down and all our pigeons are dead. OH GOD!
Please, readers, spread the word; we will NOT be silenc